Afraid Of Commitment? Do It For You
Are you afraid of a committed relationship withâ€¦.. YOU? I bet you thought I was talking about an intimate partner. You're right! It's your soul. It doesn't get more intimate than that.
As a yoga teacher and a studio owner, I often hear from many that it's hard to create, much less commit to a daily yoga, sadhana or spiritual practice. That makes sense to me.
We have so many demands on the path of the "householder." If we choose to be in society, have jobs and relationships, then that's the path we're on.
The path of the householder is one of fulfillment. We are here to fulfill our desires and step into our destiny. The path of the monk is one of renunciation or letting go from society. There is nothing wrong with the monk path; it's just another way. But most of us are on the householder path.
With fulfillment, which is very lovely by the way, also comes lots of responsibilities!
Our lives go though many stages, from studying, starting a career, growing in our career, relationships, perhaps raising children, community responsibilities, taking care of our elders, sometimes illness and so on.
Many of us were not raised to create a daily self-care ritual. In other cultures, it's quite common to start your day doing your morning prayers, exercises or the harvesting and preparing of cooking the day's food for you and your family.
Committing to some sort of daily ritual for yourself will come back to you ten-fold. Not to mention your family, loved ones, friends, business, co-workers. The list goes on and on.
I often say in my prenatal classes; as a mother lives so shall she birth, parent and so on. If we're stressed out and depleted, that negative energy will trickle right on down into the family, our job and anything else on our agenda.
That's a recipe for disaster.
Daily sadhana doesn't have to be some big, long drawn-out vision that seems too overwhelming to start. The ego will talk you right out of it, saying you have way too many other things to do to take time for yourself.
But it's wrong. This is the smartest thing you could ever do.
10 tips for creating soul time:
1. Start small.
2. Start with what you like to do! What are you drawn to? What feels good? What connects your soul?
3. For some it can be the "yoga" of a walk in nature. So balancing for your energy and mental bodies.
4. Others may like the "yoga" of going to the gym, the tennis court, the golf course. You get my point. Everyone has a different "yoga." Yoga = union, to merge with one's Higher Self. The finite human self merging with the Infinite Self.
5. Lighting a candle and a 10-minute prayer, a reading from your favorite spiritual text or journaling. It's a profound way to start or end your day!
6. Listening to relaxing music or mantra while you make breakfast or get dressed is a great way to fit in your inner-connecting time.
7. A guided meditation (there are many out there), a walking meditation or maybe a formal, seated, mantra meditation. From as short as 3 minutes to as long as 20 minutes, once or twice a day. These options are great ways to start calming the nervous system and the mind.
8. A pranayam (breath exercise), a few yoga poses, a small or medium set of poses or a full-out class at the studio.
9. A self- oil massage or aromatherapy with essential oils.
10. Keep repeating to yourself; "I'm worth it." This is a practice in itself!!
Look at your schedule each day and adjust accordingly. Just don't skip your "me" time.
As they say when they teach us safety measures on an airplane, put your oxygen mask on first.
I've been on this path a long time, so I can attest to the ebb and flow of my sadhana depending on my life's flow. Some days, I just don't have the energy or I feel down (in my human side) or I'm running to the airport. Those are the hardest days to keep up. I know, though, if I keep up my sadhana, I'll be kept up! Even if it's for 10 minutes, I just do it!
I always recommend a sadhana buddy. I have one. She and I check in everyday. It's a beautiful way to be accountable to myself, and it's a great support to have a friend on the same path.
Most importantly: DO SADHANA FOR YOURSELF. NOBODY ELSE.
You will naturally glow and grow into a desire for more "soul connection" time as you keep up this daily self-love time. Let it happen gradually.
As you are attracted to more sadhana space, you will find yourself adjusting your schedule around your practices, not trying to fit THEM into your life.
Trust me, you'll never be sorry you took time for your SOUL. It's the best time you'll ever spend. In the end we won't wished we worked more; we'll wished we connected to Love moreâ€¦â€¦